Pictured above is Vince and Joan Raine on their wedding day.
Real life is a love story. Rooted deep In the town of Hazlet is a love story for the ages. Learning more about it is like unearthing a rare jewel.
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TAPinto had the privilege to enjoy an interview with the family: “I loved interviewing the Raine sisters. Sharing time with them felt like enjoying time with longtime friends, because they make you feel so comfortable. It was also comparable to watching a wonderful love story, because they recall their parent's love with great detail. It was an emotional rollercoaster thrill too, of laughing and tearing up at times while remembering great times past. They have that much great energy. I missed them when I left the interview.”
Joan and Vince Raine chose the Bayshore in the late 1950’s to settle and raise a family. Over the next few decades, the couple gave their five daughters Susan, Carol, Marianne, Patti, Joan, and son Vinnie, a solid foundation. One built on loyalty and love for family, God, and community.
According to the Raine children their parents taught them by example, to give back, and to always help others. Over the years, in addition to taking care of their six children, Joan and Vinnie provided shelter and food in their Hazlet home for community members who were struggling to make ends meet. Thanksgiving was a time to invite guests, sometimes almost strangers, to dinner who otherwise did not have a holiday meal to enjoy. When a teenage boy who was friends with the family needed a place to live, Joan and Vince welcomed him into their home. Joe Collins became part of the family. They called him their 7th child, and just like their other children, he lived with them until he was old enough to live on his own.
The sisters all say that their parents gave freely without wanting any recognition. In fact, as a family they resisted taking credit or talking with others about their giving. The history with mom Joan is that she grew up an only child, her older brother died at only two years old, from pneumonia. Her daughters share that their mom's dream was to have a big happy, loving family, who made a difference in the community.
Decades later the Raine sisters are a leading force with giving back. And, not just in Hazlet, but throughout Monmouth County and beyond. Chances are that if you live in Monmouth County, you probably know one or more of the sisters already. Get them in a room together to socialize, and it feels like an immediate party!
They are self-confident, accomplished, smart, conversational, and full of life. They each possess a great sense of humor, matched by an easy laugh. Together, they can talk at the same time, switching subjects and finishing each other’s sentences.
They enjoy making quick fun of each other, taking turns with witty jabs and infectious laughter. All 5 of them have deep respect and gratitude for their parents and recall many of the reasons they love them so deeply. Their love for family is so palpable that they often tear up as they talk. They laugh and attribute this to their mom who they say would cry very easily because she was so compassionate and caring.
It’s for certain that as much as the sisters make fun of one another, they would also fiercely protect each other from anyone outside the circle poking fun at one of them. They are tight.
Joan and Vinnie’s firstborn, the former Susan Raine, was crowned Miss Hazlet of 1971. Fast forward to today; Susan lives in Hazlet, is now the mother of 5 grown children, Susan and her husband Gene are the proud grandparents of 11 grandchildren, and one on the way!
All smiles: Above is Miss Hazlet 1971, with her little sisters looking up to her.
Susan, now a public servant today, is Monmouth County Commissioner Deputy Director, Sue Kiley. Her responsibilities among many include liaison to; the Human Services Department, the Board of Health, Division of Aging and Disabilities, Division of County Adjuster, Division of Mental Health and Addiction Services, Division of Planning and Contracting for Human Services, Division of Social Services and the Juvenile Detentions Alternatives Initiative Program.
If that is not enough to keep her busy, last year the county rolled out a new program with Kiley at the helm, called Monmouth ACTS (Assisting Communities through Services). The first program of its kind in the county, Monmouth ACTS successfully brings together county resources to match the needs of the community members.
Kiley has also been on the forefront of county management regarding the pandemic. Along with other members of the Commissioner Board, Sue has been instrumental to implementing the CARES Act in the county, to assist businesses and organizations impacted by the pandemic, with grant opportunities.
Kiley has also been providing daily county COVID-19 updates, and partnering with organizations like the Grunin Foundation, to provide free COVID-19 testing, etc. A true public servant, Kiley is often helping community members behind the scenes and not seeking recognition. That altruistic family tradition is evident in the work that Sue reports to every day, and all the various charities she assists in her capacity as a board member. For example, Sue is on the executive board of the RAINE Foundation, a 501c3 founded by her sister Patti (Raine) Dickens in 2001, to help families of 911 victims.
The RAINE Foundation today provides support for the underprivileged year-round, but Christmas, is the busiest time of the year for them. Patti (Raine) Dickens, lives in Hazlet with her husband Matt, and they are the parents of three children. RAINE is an acronym for Reaching All In Need Every Day.
However, what very few people know is that RAINE is the founder’s family’s last name, because the sisters all go by their married last names! The fact it’s their last name can be like pulling teeth to find out. If you ask her or the other sisters what it stands for you will most likely receive an answer about what the acronym stands for, and they leave out the family name connection. Patti comments, “I don’t want it to be about me or my family’s last name. RAINE is much bigger than that. It’s gotten so big, and I don’t want to take credit or receive extra attention. RAINE is now about all the volunteers and everyone RAINE helps.”
Today RAINE helps thousands of families throughout the year, every year. In November 2020, RAINE delivered hundreds of families complete Thanksgiving feasts. Patti comments, “The need is greater than ever, but we know that our volunteers are more committed to helping than ever before, and we make ithappen.” In December 2020 RAINE delivered over 3000 gift requests, double the requests from last year!
All the sisters and their families, and hundreds of local volunteers, have been involved in helping RAINE over the last twenty years. Patti comments, “ I love that so many people from the community feel a commitment to RAINE and know that they can help others just by being a part of it. I am very proud to say that all of my sisters now sit on the Board of the RAINE Foundation, and are very active in making sure our goals are accomplished. They join an amazing group of volunteers who have remained committed to the focus and mission.”
In 2020 there were limits with social distancing. However in 2019 RAINE Christmas had over 500 local volunteers, of which 41 were Santa’s helpers dressed the part to deliver 1500 gifts from Sayerville, to Asbury Park, with 37 different fire stations assigned to various towns to escort Santa with lights flashing and sirens blazing. READ: The Magic of the RAINE Foundation Brings Christmas Joy to over 1500 Children.
Dickens commented, “RAINE Christmas is our family’s Christmas. Every year we truly love helping all the families, collecting the toys, wrapping all the gifts… that’s what our Christmas is all about. My son is the bike captain, and this year he is building 130 new bikes with his team. My daughter, Morgan, has taken on volunteer coordination - a job that has been difficult at best!” If you would like to donate to the RAINE Foundation, the giving continues all year long and every penny goes to help someone in -need, click HERE.
WATCH: A brief video of the RAINE Foundation's Santa's Workshop pre-pandemic 2019. The Bayshore community comes together to fulfill 1500 children's wishes for Christmas:
When talking about their mom, Marianne commented, “Our mom lived her life giving back by helping others. It was a natural way of life for her, and we all learned by her example.”
Joan adds, “Our mom taught us that ‘You need to treat everyone equally, treat others as you would like to be treated,’ and that is how we live our lives, and how we in turn teach our children to live. Our dad taught us to be strong and our mom taught us empathy and compassion.”
Sue commented, “Our father loved local politics. He was Chairman of the Republican party in Hazlet, and served on the zoning board and the planning board. He was the funniest man I ever met. He could make anyone laugh. A very dry sense of humor he was a ranking officer in the Toastmaster Association.”
The sisters, all adore their father. During the beginning of the interview we sat in a room where there hangs a large photo of Vince Raine. Carol commented, "He had five daughters who absolutely adored him, and he adored us. We always knew how much our dad loved all of us, and it made us feel very confident throughout our lives." The photo is faded and appears almost black and white, yet their dad is looking right at you and all of them have one story after the other to bring him in the room. "We miss him so much, he was the best," commented Sue. "Just thinking about him can make me laugh."
Above photo is Vince Raine.
When their father was diagnosed with stage four cancer, he insisted on driving into NYC to deliver gifts to the Sisters of the Poor, to distribute to the underprivileged for Christmas. Marianne commented, “I said Dad, what are you doing? You’re stage 4 cancer and you’re delivering gifts everywhere! He said, 'Mar, I’m crammin’ for finals!' He always knew how to make us laugh, even when he was dying.”
Even beyond that...After he passed Vince Raine had a packed crowd of people laughing at his funeral, when his eulogy written by him was delivered. It began with, “You are probably all wondering why I gathered you here today…”
Joan adds, “We were trying not to cry because on a good day we are all so sentimental, and he ended up having us all laughing at his funeral, with his own words. He also told us all in his eulogy to ‘take care of each other always and take care of your sainted mother’.” According to the Raine sisters, their mom Joan was a devout Catholic with a deep devotion to the Blessed Mother, and she instilled the importance of faith in her children all of their lives. Teaching their children to be strong in their faith and character was important to Joan and Vince.
Sue comments, “There are a few sayings our Dad instilled in us because he raised us to be strong women. He knew women were equal to men, and pushed us to understand we could accomplish anything we wanted to do. He would say, ‘Sue, it’s a man’s world and you need to figure out how to deal with it.’ It was his way of saying, just because the world is a man’s world, doesn’t mean you can’t do everything and be who you want to be. He pushed us to be leaders. When we accomplished goals, he wanted to know what was next. He always believed we could do anything, so we did too!”
Before Sue was elected to the position of Monmouth County Freeholder, she was a sales executive, and before that a nurse. Carol spent 25 years on Wall Street trading International Money markets. As a V.P. for Tullet Prebon, she managed the overnight and short date trading desk. Carol retired in 2005 from that career and works as a marketing executive for Maser Consulting. Patti enjoyed a very successful career in NYC, first in the legal field, and then as Director of Human Resources for a medical publishing company. Currently, she is enjoying her new 'encore' role at the Diocese of Trenton, working with parishes in the Development Office, and according to Patti, "I'm LOVING it!" Joan has had a long successful career in the insurance business, and is an active volunteer for Feed a Friend, an organization that provides food for the homeless population in Charlston South Carolina, where Joan now lives. Marianne has enjoyed a successful career, and currently works in a job she loves, for Senator Joe M. Kyrillos.
The Raine children in turn raised their children with the same “You can do anything” way. A beautiful example is Carol’s daughter, Allie, born with a chromosomal abnormality called an unbalanced translocation. There were many challenges growing up for Allie, but the tight-knit family was always there to support Allie and encourage her and push her. Today Allie is thriving and brings so much joy to the family. Allie’s cousins would volunteer to be Buddies in the Challenger Sports program so that Allie could play soccer, basketball, tennis and other sports. Her Aunt Marianne, started a Brownie troop so that Allie could participate. Allie now holds two jobs, one at ShopRite in Hazlet, and the other, her favorite, at No Limits Café in Middletown. No Limits Café hires individuals with intellectual disabilities and trains them to work in the restaurant field.
The sisters also recalled a time when the whole family was in crisis. Carol was diagnosed with advanced breast cancer, and 6 months to the day of her diagnosis Patti was diagnosed with breast cancer. Then right after Patti, Joan was diagnosed with so many pre-cancerous lumps that she had a prophylactic double mastectomy. The sisters and their families came together like an army to fight it. Their motto during this time was, “When you’re walking through Hell, KEEP WALKING!”
Carol’s daughter Erika Rech and Marianne’s son Mike Ruane were both 15 at the time. They were devastated watching their aunts and in Erika’s case her mom Carol, suffer through the breast cancer journey. In typical Raine fashion, the two 15 -year old cousins started a charity called Breast Intentions, a 501 (c) (3). They began selling t-shirts, candy, and bracelets at church to raise money for women in financial crisis who were battling breast cancer in their community. Realizing they had to step up their game, they held a formal Gala for several years to raise funds. All donations raised go directly to families in crisis to pay rent, purchase wigs, prosthetics, lymphedema garments, transportation to and from treatments, co-pays, utility bills and so much more. Today, Breast Intentions operates in NJ, and Illinois. Joan serves as the treasurer, and like the family's other charitable commitments, the whole family supports it. To learn more about Breast Intentions or to make a donation: www.breastintentions.org
Carol added, “My dad taught us strength and our mother taught us compassion and empathy. Our parents adored each other every day. It was beautiful to watch them together. We all cry so easily, and our father always said to us, ‘It’s ok to cry, but never ever in business, don’t cry in business,’ and I never have. The only time I ever cried at work was on my last day, after 25 years, when my entire trading floor gave me a standing ovation as I left the building for the last time."
Joan adds, “He would challenge us to debate him on an issue, any political issue. He was so good at debate and then after he won, he would say, ‘Ok, I’m taking the other side now let’s switch,’ and we would start over and he would win that round too! He was so good at it, and he was the funniest man I’ve ever known. He had a quick wit and he could make anyone laugh with his dry sense of humor.”
The sisters say their brother Vinnie who lives in Florida with his wife Noelle possesses the same great sense of humor as their dad and with the same delivery. Patti mentioned, “We don’t get to see Vinnie and his family enough, but when we do, we absolutely love it, we relish it. Vinnie is so much fun, and it’s such great banter, he’s so much like our dad!” When their father died he left his business, a collection agency to his son Vinnie who has now grown it into a successful national business.
Regarding their parents’ love story, Patti commented, “We always felt the love our parents had for us, and every day we felt the love they had for each other. I know that the saying is ‘there is no perfect marriage’, but I always felt our mom and dad had a perfect marriage. They loved each other so much every day. They were kind to each other always.”
Carol added, “When dad passed, mom said, ‘my bags are packed, and I’m ready to go,’ and that’s what she said on the day she died. ‘My bags are packed, and I’m ready to see Daddy.’ They loved each other that much.”
Recalling the love story of their parents they looked through a photo book together they had made for their parent’s anniversary one year. That brought about so many sweet and funny stories and a lot of laughter.
WATCH 30 seconds of the RAINE sisters looking through a family photo album:
The family always kept humor going and a very fun story they love to recall is the story of the purse! One of them had won a purse at an auction. They wrapped up the purse and gave it to their mom for a Christmas present. Well she was aghast and commented that it was ‘the ugliest purse she ever saw’. Then the next Christmas, she wrapped it up and gave it back to one of the sisters and that started a family tradition that went on for years. They have such a big family with a lot of women, and no one knew who was going to be next to get the ugly purse!!
When their mom Joan passed, the family buried the purse with her. It had become such a part of their family traditions. It wasn’t long after she passed that one of her friends dropped off framed copies of a picture of the purse for each sister. Just like her husband spoke to the family in his own eulogy, Joan gave instructions to her close friend to deliver the framed pictures of the purse to her daughters to have the last laugh. Today the daughter’s all have the framed photo of the infamous ugly purse hanging in their homes.
Above pic is of the purse that was passed around as a gift for years as a family fun tradition!
When Joan was that young girl wishing to have a large happy family someday, she could not have imagined that she would have a devoted husband to share her dream, have 6 children, “adopt” another to make 7, have 19 grandchildren and 15 great-grandchildren. She could not have imagined the dedicated children she gave to the world, to carry on her legacy of altruistic giving. The kindness she showed her own family is shared every day as they treat others the way they want to be treated. The real-life love story continues….
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